I grew up with an abundance of rice, sweet delicacies and love. My peers dubbed me piglet in return, and I was all sorts of flavour combinations, namely bitter and salty. Everyone has insecurities of their own, but I used to think God was unfair for giving other girls fewer things to be physically insecure about.

As a result, I grew up with an intense dislike for myself, and this reflected in my art, lifestyle, and the validation I sought from people. I remember singing the song Reflection from the movie Mulan and getting choked up in tears whenever I’d arrive at the line, “when will my reflection show who I am inside?”

I cared very little about discovering myself and built my world on brand names, chasing the limelight, and a relationship that caused my health to spiral down.

But oh, for as much of the dark I have seen, how this has only amplified the Lord’s light and loving-kindness. I’ll loudly echo the words of Psalm 23:6 and proudly testify of how His mercy has drawn me out of that muck I built for myself and showed me beauty like no other.

[Surely your goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever, Psalm 23:6].

Not the kind of beauty that we are littered with daily on social media, but the kind that shifts one’s perspective from thinking “what can I do to fit in?” to a loud, “BREAK THAT MOULD!”

By definition, a mould is a hollow container. Hollow is what I was, being defined by the impermanent and meaningless chasings after the wind. A container filled to the brim and overflowing was what I became when I began boldly seeing myself through the eyes of a fiercely loving God who authored women empowerment since the days of Queen Esther.

Through the thick of media propagation on body positivity and weight acceptance, I saw and heard what God really had to say about true beauty.

That it starts from the inside- [Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight 1 Peter 3:3-4].

And it doesn’t stop there- [Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your bodies 1 Corinthians 6:19-20].

Beyond fitting the societal moulds of beauty, I as a woman, am called to be a reflection of my Creator’s glory, both inside and out. His brand is worth representing, His approval is the only thing worth seeking, and my relationship with Him sets the tone for everything.

Here are my go to’s and reminders of what a strong, healthy, stylish, God-fearing woman looks like:

·       She speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue. [Proverbs 31:26, and pretty much the entire chapter]

·       In the same way, the women are to be worthy of respect, not malicious talkers but temperate and trustworthy in everything. [Timothy 3:11]

·       But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. [Matthew 6:33]

·       Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one gets the prize? Run in such a way as to get the prize. Everyone who competes in the games goes into strict training. They do it to get a crown that will not last, but we do it to get a crown that will last forever. Therefore I do not run like someone running aimlessly; I do not fight like a boxer beating the air. No, I strike a blow to my body and make it my slave so that after I have preached to others, I myself will not be disqualified for the prize.” [1 Corinthians 9:24-27]

I’ve found that the work starts from within and continuously progresses out. It’s not either-or. It’s personal and not a one size fits all. It shifts our gaze from worldly standards to the things that matter most. As we continue to make this a daily practice, we begin to experience a major perspective change.

Suddenly it’s not about having the right body but working on what we were given. Not about labels, but wearing what’s decent and true to who you are changing into. And no longer about squeezing into a dress that was never meant for your build, but fitting into God’s definition of what a true, faithful, and independent woman should be.

*All scripture is taken from the New International Version.